I applied to participate in Mizzou's Alternative Spring Break program in September, and I cannot believe I am leaving for Delaplane, Virginia next month. In case you thought I was kidding about the "alternative" aspect of this program, we are renting two minivans to travel safely from Missouri to Virginia and back again. I literally cannot imagine a vehicle that would be more of a chastity belt than a minivan. "Hey, sexy, wanna come back to my place...in my minivan?" says no one.
In all seriousness, the minivans will probably be very comfortable, allow for ample personal space and be very safe on the road. (I swear while writing that sentence a fanny pack briefly appeared around my waist.)
I am very excited for this environmental trip, but there is a significant amount of planning that needs to occur between now and then. For starters, my group will be restoring hiking trails from winter erosion, and while I am eager to begin this task, I need to make sure that I am in excellent physical shape. I don't want to be the annoying person that cannot do any physical labor, or the fool who injures himself the first day and is forced to spend the rest of the trip alone in the cabin. "Go on without me; I love sitting in my bunk, waiting for everyone else to return," I would say before eating everything in the refrigerator while they were gone.
I also need to work on my credibility as a hiker, because when I told my brother I was going on this trip he actually thought I was kidding. "Wait...you are going on a hiking trip?" he asked while coughing up his beverage. "Yes, Max. I know it's hard to believe, but I can count the number of hiking trips we took where I didn't cry halfway through the trail on one hand," I said before pausing. "Never mind, we are descendants of farmers; I will be fine," I lied.
While Missouri has shown me the "wonders" of living in the middle of nowhere, I will need to work on vacationing in a town where the Wikipedia page brags about its post office and antique shop. (I'm sure they are just being modest and I can really hop on over to Cafe Nordstrom for a fresh salad with grilled chicken and iced tea.)
We are also planning to venture up to Washington D.C. for a quick day trip, and I am positive we won't be taking any touristy photos in front of any historical buildings. I'm also really positive that I won't use every possible moment to brag about how I was a Summer Organizer for President Obama's reelection campaign and how he has surely made dinner plans with us.
In case it wasn't clear enough from the amount of humor I interjected into this post, I am very thrilled to be going on this trip and I cannot wait to tell everyone about it once I return. However, I will only be able to go on this trip if I can receive additional funds from generous donors who care about my well being and don't want me to cry myself to sleep for the next 50 years. *Ahem* I know anyone who reads this blog has supported me in some capacity in my life, whether it be my academic career, the production of my recent short film or just with love and kindness over the years. So, if you would like to keep the awesome train that is my happiness moving, please donate a dollar or two on my fundraising page. I really do appreciate any amount given, and I will make certain to love you all the more for doing it.